Tina Feeeeeeeeey

Tina Fey's visit to Google last week (or was it the week before?) was a totally rad experience. I had a meeting that went until just before her talk, so I had to hover in a catwalk to the side of the stage instead of sitting way up front like I had hoped, but I got to watch the whole thing. I just really really love her. The video of the entire one hour talk is on YouTube, but Gawker has also posted a highlights reel. The editing is a bit choppy, but you get the gist - namely, that she is as wonderful as you want her to be.

Brew for all

Via The Kitchn: Brooklyn Brew Shop has a one-gallon, $40 all-grain brewing kit that looks like a great option if you are one of the dozens of people who has told me you'd like to start brewing but that it seems intimidating. It's a super small batch of beer (two six packs), but it'll give you a sense of what goes into the process, and the various types of beer they have on offer look tasty.

I'm a little skeptical of the value of doing only one gallon at a time - this kit is $40, which is the cost of ingredients for a 5-gallon batch - but it's worth it if you don't want to invest the $200+ in the gear (boil pot, carboys, etc) for the larger boil. So do it! And let me know how it goes.

Way better than a dollhouse

As someone with a past interest in Rube Goldberg devices and a current interest in San Francisco, I'm smitten with this dude's crazy toothpick rollercoaster sculpture thing.

It is muy muy rad.

Trust me

Llama Font.

So I pretty much have to keep these right?

That's what I thought.

$Z

I love LearnVest, because their emails are a daily reminder of how financially un-savvy I am. Half the time their articles aren't relevant to me, but even then, they're still (usually) interesting.

For example: apparently, if your last name starts with a letter at the end of the alphabet, you're more likely to be an impulse shopper. Really? Really? The theory is that by the time you're name got called in school, they were all out of birthday cupcakes, or something. You'd think that needing to pay attention for a longer period of time ("Please raise your hand when I call your name...") would make you more patient, not less. But I guess you also learn to get while the getting's good, instead of sitting there, waiting to get shafted. It seems like a pretty limited study, but still, interesting.

Happy to be a B.

I am the worst, I know

Even though I posted an adorable animals video last week, I can't bring myself to not post this one. Behold, a baby penguin being tickled. DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN PET A PENGUIN LIKE YOU WOULD A CAT? I didn't. I also didn't know they were ticklish. This is a big day for me.

Also, the penguin noises are making my cats freak out. I don't know if they want to eat it or befriend it or what.

We're moving!

Last night we signed the lease for an apartment in the Lower Haight. The place isn't perfect, but I'm excited. When I'm not totally panicked.

First, the minuses:

• very little closet space
• small bedroom
• no parking
• no laundry
• more $ than our current place

The pluses:

• private covered deck with storage shed
• a big backyard (that no one is keeping up right now - hello, garden)
• large kitchen and living room
• separate toilet and shower/sink rooms
• lovely Victorian details
• a firepit in the backyard!

On the whole I'm pumped for the changes. It's going to be a pain to give up parking, and it's going to hurt to pay a bit more each month, but we've been in our place 3.5 years and have reaped the benefit of comically low rent for longer than we expected. And a backyard, hooboy. Maybe this will be us!

I've posted many photos on Flickr, more than anyone probably cares to look at. In sum, it's an old Victorian that will probably be cold and dark and make us ready to move someplace new and shiny and bland after a year, but really, I can't get over the firepit. Party time.

Here's a few photo selections. The living room:

More of the living room:

The kitchen (ugly but huge):

The view out the kitchen door onto the porch:

And the backyard:

We are going to fix it up and make it so very very pretty.

Why why why

What is Kate Spade doing to me? A cruiser bike, in bright green, and a line of crazy expensive purses that clip right onto the beautiful sucker.

I waaaant it, especially now that I'm moving to an apartment on the Wiggle. (More on the move later!)

Eff Yes

Insta-brewery

I am intrigued by this brewing machine. It's so pretty and shiny, and makes brewing so easy! But it's supposed to be a drawn-out process, not something you can do in a week by simply pushing some buttons. But how awesome would it be to churn out a new beer each week, without all the mess and the fear that your brew is going to get contaminated because you always forget to sterilize the damn airlock?

Since it's $4500 it's all speculation for me anyway. But if I win the lottery, I'm adding it to the list of stupid stuff I'll buy. Already on the list: a slide to go between floors in my new penthouse apartment, a fridge always stocked with burrata, and a tropical island which only people with muffin tops or cankles can visit.

I want to walk around with you

Last weekend was deeply satisfying. Friday night our friends had a hip hop show at a jazz club - confusing, I know - and we ducked into a fancy-beer bar first for a drink. I had not heard of any of the eight beers on tap, which was exciting, and rare. I got a rye that I know can't remember the name of, but it was delicious, and I will definitely be back there soon. Their sign should say: Like Toronado, But Nicer.

The show itself was entertaining, especially now that I have learned that the most crazy-dancing, bra-as-shirt-wearing lady at the party is a Wellesley alum. Of course.

Saturday morning I went to hiking yoga, which was glorious. It was a warm and sunny day, and the class took us up Telegraph Hill and down tiny little streets with amazing houses on them. Every twenty minutes or so we'd stop walking and do some poses.

Up the Filbert Steps.

We finished up with stretches at Washington Square Park, where even the street weirdos looked at us like we were posing like nutbars, then we went up and over Telegraph Hill one more time.

It was a nice reminder how good it is to be a tourist in your own city every once in a while. We wrapped withsome shopping at the Ferry Building farmer's market, picking up our valet-parked-for-free-by-the-SFBC bikes, and pedaling home for a nap. Kristina and I then reconvened on the patio of Ziryab for beer and wine in the rest of the day's sun. At night Mike and I headed to Alameda for an impromptu gathering that ended late at night with me asleep in my college roommate's lap, just like old times. I got a pretty good back scratch out of the deal, too.

Sunday we drove north to Russian River Brewery for dinner (check out that wicked Comic Sans site!) and their epic beer sampler.

Four of these were sour beers, which I got all to myself. Mike handled the hoppiest ones, per usual. We refilled our growler with a lovely pale ale (that we wound up getting to share with friends on Monday after we shanghai'd them into coming over).

The point of Sunday night was the Animal Collective show in Petaluma, and it was weird, as expected. It was made weirder by the fact that it was all ages, and no beer was served. It was also regular-type Animal Collective weird as well, but they played Summertime Clothes and I was fulfilled.

It's all downhill from here

Tonight is a stellar night. Tonight I got to meet my favorite blogger, which in itself wasn't revelatory - well, a little bit, she's a lot prettier and breathier than I expected (she has super long blonde hairs, like a human My Little Pony) - but it was super nice. I got to try to convince her to come talk at Google, and I gave her my email address. She complimented my belt. I had her sign books for me, for Mike's sister-in-law, and for my boss. All great. Stellar, even, since I've committed to that adjective.

But the best part...wait for it...was waiting in line. I bought my copies of the book in the tiny Omnivore Books, then waited in line for 30+ minutes to get Heidi to sign them. There was plenty of wine, and I made friends with the people behind me. One had the most appreciative laugh I've ever heard. I want to record her for my own personal life-affirming laugh track. And turns out another knew a Wellesley chick that also just happened to be there, and the other is an editor at McSweeney's. Oh. my. god.

The whole thing was just great. I made friends, I met someone I respect very much, I bought some books for other people that will (hopefully) make them happy. Then I came home to two text messages, from two friends that are going to be roommates soon, in New York. And I introduced them! My sense of friend-parental pride could not be greater.

Finally, this.

The Facebook isn't for everyone, and it isn't for me all the time. But this is the kind of stuff that gives social networking whatever good name it has. Alicia D. Fagan (rough name, seriously - the Oliver Twist association isn't ideal), I thank you.

Hold on. Hold on. What?

Guys! I mean ladies. I mean whoever. Gail Collins says that "one-third of all American women have their uterus removed at some point in their lives".

Is that true? Is it? How is that possible? It can't be right. IT CAN'T BE RIGHT. But my brain decided long ago that Gail Collins is always right!

Let's go to the CDC. There are about 150 million ladies in the US. The CDC says about 20 million women have had a hysterectomy. That's more like 15% of the population, if my math is right (it usually isn't). Which makes me feel better. But the CDC also says that "The three conditions most often associated with hysterectomy were uterine leiomyoma ("fibroid tumors"), endometriosis, and uterine prolapse."

Uterine prolapse. Oh my god, that sounds terrible. Maybe they can just remove mine now and we can avoid prolapsing. It's either got to stay right where it is, or come out altogether.

This is really terrible timing to come upon all this heebie-jeebie uterine business. Why? I'm going to the gyn tomorrow.

Handy dandy

Here's a map of San Francisco farmer's markets, including when they run.

She's tomahawking him!

When was the last time you heard someone totally lose their nuts laughing? Hopefully recently, but if not, you should listen to this voicemail, in which a dude goes crazy while watching a bunch of old ladies beat up a dude. The thing is full o' belly laughs.

Guess what came in the mail today

The Pale King oh yes oh yes.

But I also had to order Girl with Curious Hair because I knew I'd be sad when I finished The Pale King to have come to the end of the DFW line.

Hello, Spring

The weather for the last week has been glorious, and, I guess, not conducive to blogging. Or I'm just lazy. I was violently ill a few days after our return from Austin, then Mike was sick, then it got sunny and my brain turned to happy mush. I awkwardly starred in a promotional video for Google that will be released on the intertubes sometime in the next few months. Mike's band had a few shows, which went swimmingly, and I have been cooking lots of simple food. Like baked potatoes with avocado and lots of salt, and homemade tomato soup with Israeli couscous, and arugula salads with manchego and a fried egg. We've had a few quiet nights with friends and a few raucous nights as well. I may or may not have worked from home one day last week because I was hungover. (But was a productive work-from-homer, I swear!)

Last week I did a 6+ mile run, which was totally rad - I was proud of myself for going that far, since I usually stick to 3 miles or so. But my old butt injury has flared up a bit, so I've had to make a physical therapy appointment, something I've avoided for almost a year. I knew the issue hadn't been resolved completely, so hopefully we'll figure out how to best manage it. Maybe I just need to kill my butt.

Other things that are bouncing me around the +/- scale; I've had to say no to a friend's wedding because the flight was too expensive. I feel terrible, especially because I put off RSVPing and she had to track me down and ask directly. Miss Manners would be appalled. On the plus side, that frees up a weekend for me to meet my family in Vegas to visit my brother (who is living there now, tracking tortoises). Vegas is a much more economical trip, both in terms of time and money, so long as I don't gamble too much or buy too many hoochie-mama clothes that I'll never wear in the real world.

But hey! I got my bridesmaid dress for Beth's wedding, which is a miracle, since I assumed it would be impossible to find a pink dress that didn't make me look like a Sesame Street character.

Note the cat growing out of my skirt.

Last night, as happens every night, I had weird dreams. This time it was about a person who had been missing for a year and a half, and Mike and I had to track them down. Mike's strategy for this involved ironing the bottoms of shoes. The whole thing was really scary, though I couldn't tell you why.

The end.