Coach

So here is why I think I may need a life coach. I was considering what I wanted to write about today, and I thought about all the delightful things I see on the internet over the course of a day. Facebook and Twitter are a cornucopia of clever videos, stories, and photos. And the captions! My god, the captions. Every time I see something smart on the intertubes, it gives me a pang of gladness to be a human. I avoid Pinterest altogether so I don't over-pang myself. The downside is that by the end of the day I have no internet serotonin left. I collect browser tabs with interesting stories all day, but when I get on the bus in the evening I'm straight up brain pooped.

Here's where my need for coaching comes in. When I ponder all this, I think, Has there ever been a time in the world where humans were so aware of how clever and strange we are? Does it matter that we know? What does it mean that we know?

And what does it mean for me, and for those around me?

So ok, minor existential crisis, no big thang. At least it's not compounded by honkytonky hormones like in middle school. But lately I've also been turning all conversations with friends into probing studies of their hopes and dreams. What would they ideally be doing with their time? What's their calling? If they don't have one, how did they decide what to do with their life? Are their plans achievable? How do they know? I think half the time they sit on their bar stools looking at me and thinking I'm going manic, and half the time they seem to enjoy obsessing over What They Are Going to Do With Their Lives like I do.

My Obsessing doesn't extend to actual Action, however, nor have I dipped my toe in the font of Planning. I've just stewed about how many pretty things there are in the world and how much I like them, and how many people there are in bad situations who I would like to help, and how I know I can work hard if I need to but I really don't want to work hard all the time, really. So, law and medicine, let it be known that you're off my list. I'm sure the feeling is mutual.

A number of my friends have gone to one particular career/life coach, and subsequently quit their jobs for new and exciting things. I don't want to quit my job, but I'm very much pro-new and exciting things. In favor of coaching: it would require me to dedicate time and effort to considering how I want to spend my not-nearly-enough time on this planet, and to begin to work out how I can go about achieving any life goals I might gather up. Opposed: it would require paying for something that many people figure out on their own, and seems noodley and self-indulgent. Discussing a career is a noble goal; discussing a life path seems new age-y.

And yet I'm probably going to suck it up and do it, because I'm not writing stories these days, I'm not doing comedy, and I'm not helping people. Don't worry, there's practically a team of people, led by Mike, pushing me to do those things. But for now I'm not, and maybe I just need a coach to tell me why.

[Insert your own clever sports and coaching metaphor here.]