Hold on. Hold on. What?

Guys! I mean ladies. I mean whoever. Gail Collins says that "one-third of all American women have their uterus removed at some point in their lives".

Is that true? Is it? How is that possible? It can't be right. IT CAN'T BE RIGHT. But my brain decided long ago that Gail Collins is always right!

Let's go to the CDC. There are about 150 million ladies in the US. The CDC says about 20 million women have had a hysterectomy. That's more like 15% of the population, if my math is right (it usually isn't). Which makes me feel better. But the CDC also says that "The three conditions most often associated with hysterectomy were uterine leiomyoma ("fibroid tumors"), endometriosis, and uterine prolapse."

Uterine prolapse. Oh my god, that sounds terrible. Maybe they can just remove mine now and we can avoid prolapsing. It's either got to stay right where it is, or come out altogether.

This is really terrible timing to come upon all this heebie-jeebie uterine business. Why? I'm going to the gyn tomorrow.