I need a vacation

I am losing it just a leetle bit. We leave tomorrow for India, and the normal things you're supposed to stress about at the last minute - packing, getting the house ready, whether the cats will go apeshit while you're gone and shred all the upholstery - is of no concern. Instead, I am completely unable to book a hotel for the trip, a hotel that we will need beginning Monday night. I have spent HOURS on Trip Advisor, combing through all the recommendations. I have sent dozens of emails to inquire about reservations. And it's getting down to the wire. I tend to be a seat-of-my-pants traveler, but life has been so crazy these last few months that I feel like I need a totally relaxing, totally planned vacation.

And that is where I am screwing myself. The area that we are heading to - Goa, on the Arabian Sea - is supposed to be heavenly. The beach where we are aiming to stay is stunning. But my brain is telling me that I have to pick the perfect place to stay. What the hell does that mean? There are thatched huts, there are fancy resorts, there are beach hotels. And because this is India, we can afford them all. So I'm frozen with indecision and anxiety, and the worse it gets, the more I pity myself, because this is supposed to be fun! But what if we show up and the place I picked is a shithole, and the one next door is gorgeous, and I screwed everything up?

Clearly this is going to get resolved soon, and I'm not going to be torturing myself forever. But seriously, I need to get a grip. And take a vacation.